Filled With the Desire to Pray

                “Dear Lord, my God, my heart beats faster and stronger just knowing You are here, knowing that You are listening. Why is it so hard for some people to pray to You? You love us more than we can imagine so what keeps people away from You? How can they not believe in Your love for them?

                “When you love someone, you can’t keep your eyes off them, whether it is a romantic love interest, your child, your mentor, or your parent; you just want to see them, see how they are doing, see what they are doing and see if they are happy. Their happiness brings you peace and joy. Your love for us is like that but amplified a million times more and yet there are those who don’t approach You in prayer. If we can write letters, send texts, emails or pick up the phone, why is it so difficult for some to pray?

                “Is it a lack of faith? People need the instant gratification of an immediate answer. When they don’t think they ‘hear’ an answer, they think You are not there or that You are not listening. Some think they are not worthy of Your love; that there is no way You the almighty powerful God, would be interested in insignificant them. That’s ridiculous. You created them to love and to be loved.

                “Others think they don’t need to talk to God; that prayer is only for the weak or simple minded. They think they are doing just fine on their own. That is also ridiculous. No one is that well off. Who wouldn’t benefit from a conversation with the one who made them and the one who loves them so much that they only want the very best for them? How silly it is when a teenager won’t talk to a parent about something that is bothering him/her. The parent knows the child very well and wants that child to be happy and successful in everything. The parent can see things on a larger scale and in the context of the whole picture. When the teenager refuses to talk to the parent and blindly tries to move ahead without any guidance, they often travel a rough road. Why not seek some help and companionship from one who is full of love for him/her?

                “Then there are those who are blind or indifferent. Who could be so numb to not care about You and Your great love? Who refuses a precious gift of eternal love indifferently? It makes no sense to me. Indifference infuses an entire person. Indifference muffles passion. Indifference stifles joy. Indifference blocks peace replacing it with numbness. Who prefers life without passion, joy and peace? Who prefers to just exist?

                “Oh Lord send the Holy Spirit to fly through the souls of all Your people like a strong wind to get their attention. Then may the Holy Spirit gently awaken the soul’s desire to seek You in prayer. Call Your people in a way that causes them to turn to You, longing to seek You in prayer. May they pour out their hearts to You. May they tell You all their hopes and desires the way lovers share their dreams with each other, the way a child tells his parent about his day, the way a young adult will sometimes truly ask for advice from a parent or mentor. Oh dear Lord, may their hearts beat stronger and faster knowing You are there, listening and loving them all. May they be filled with the desire to pray.”

Filled With the Holy Spirit

                “Oh dear Lord, I humbly place myself in Your presence. I feel so small, vulnerable, exposed. What do You see when you look at me? Your gaze is more than our humanly view of what lies directly in front of our eyes. Your gaze penetrates much deeper, into the souls of those who humbly stand before You. I feel Your gaze pierce through my flesh and into the spirit of my soul. What do You see there? If anything is not of Your liking, pluck it out and reshape me to what You see as a thing of beauty. Empty my soul of all I don’t need, of anything that blocks Your light. I feel empty, lonely, silent and unable to move. My soul longs for You in this state more than ever. I feel like a lost starving child with nowhere to go.

                “Fill me now with the Holy Spirit. May it blow into my soul like a cool fresh breeze through the windows You have opened. Oh Holy Spirit, first You fill me with love, hope and faith. You assure me that I am becoming all that You want me to be. Oh Holy Spirit, You fill the empty void in my soul. You quench my deep longing the way water moistens my dry throat – slowly but surely restoring the dry damaged tissue layer by layer. Oh Holy Spirit, next You fill me with knowledge and intelligence, providing a mind ready to discern God’s will. I breathe in deeply, inflating my body with all Your grace. Oh dear Holy Spirit, I feel great joy and deep peace throughout my soul. I no longer feel small and vulnerable; I feel tall like I could reach a cloud and I feel protected, shrouded in the power of the Holy Spirit.

                “Dear Lord, my God, my risen King, I humbly but gratefully place myself in Your holy presence.”

Standing Before You My God

                “My Lord, My God, my love, how I long to see You face to face yet how I fear to see You face to face. My love for You wells up and pours out of me like a fountain creating a stream that flows to You and draws me closer and closer to You. I can’t help myself; I must follow this stream, caught in this current of love to Your heart. Yet at the thought of actually seeing You standing in front of me, I tremble and bow my head and can’t find the courage to look up into Your eyes.

“I feel Your hand on my cheek and under my chin, gently lifting my face to Yours. I hear Your kind sweet voice saying, “My child, how I have longed for this moment as well.” “But Lord,” I cry, tears blurring my eyes and a lump choking my throat, “I am not worthy to stand here. I have failed You in so many ways.” You answer, “Yes, but every time, you turned back to me acknowledging your transgression and seeking my help and grace. Open your eyes my child, your faith has healed you.”

Distractions

                “Oh dear Lord, I am plagued with distractions. Why do I allow myself to be so easily distracted? My mind wanders in thought, sometimes focused yet other times, chaotically bouncing from one thing to the next. My time here on earth is so short when one considers all history behind this moment and all eternity from here on out. Since I am only here on earth for so short a time, I need to focus my mind on the things that will help prepare me for eternity with You. There are many things here on earth now that are just passing fancies. They pass through pleasantly like a mild breeze on a warm day, but they just pass through and then are gone. The same goes for things that disturb me and my peace. They also just pass through and then are gone. I need to remember this and make the most out of every experience I have and in every person I meet and not cling to the thoughts of things past and of possible future events. The things You send me are in the here and now and help to shape me.

                “Help me Lord to seek You and Your teaching in everything I do and experience. Help me walk with Your hand on my shoulder throughout this life, always pointing out how something that I do or see or say can bring me closer to You and closer to the image You see of me. Walking with You throughout this life frees me to welcome all that comes to me as a way to learn about You and Your love. Help me stay focused on You and not to be distracted. All distractions are like a haze that blurs my vision of You and numbs my hearing of Your Word. Remind me always of Your great love and nothing can distract me from the joining of our hearts.”

Remembering 9-11

                “My Lord, my God, I am filled with mixed emotions on this day, September 11, 12 years after the attack on America when so many lives were lost, when the World Trade Center fell in New York, when the Pentagon in Washington DC was severely damaged and when the plane that was destined for more destruction was taken over by brave citizens who sacrificed their lives and saved many others by causing the plane to crash in field in Pennsylvania instead of its intended target. It was a tragedy that awakened the American people from a haze of complacency. It was awful. I remember being horrified seeing it on the news and wondering how You could allow this to happen. I was much younger then and didn’t know You very well.

                “Over a decade later, I recognize Your providence in those tragic events. Though You called many souls to heaven that day, You also brought out many heroes on that day and in the days that followed. People no longer looked only at their individual lives and needs, they looked beyond themselves and they felt the desire to help Your people, no matter who, what or where they were. The things that had consumed the pursuits of so many Americans were put on hold to help others. There was a great surge of prayer throughout the entire nation. Suddenly, it was okay to pray again publicly. God and faith were once again mentioned on the television and in the media where before, it was considered taboo to discuss such matters. It pains me to think that it took something so awful to turn people to God but when I look back throughout history, mass killings and tragedies were not uncommon in the world. The difference is that in the modern world, we are able to see, hear and experience something happening anywhere as it happens through the media. That tragic day was relived and experienced by everyone everywhere and the day received the ominous name that at the mere mention brings a wave of strong emotions: 9/11.

                “Over a decade later, I don’t know if our world has improved. I don’t see the same fervor and pained hope of the people turning to You as I did back then. Our government is currently attempting to take You out of the picture and place You in a category of choice, hobby or mere interest. Where is the awe of You and Your power to heal? Where is the wonder at the immense power of love and prayer? Where is the outpouring of love and charity for our neighbors? Have we forgotten the orphaned children and the broken families, widows and widowers from that tragic day? Can we still hear the sound of anguish and deep sorrow that erupted from the lips of all those affected?

                “Dear Lord, do not let us fall back into apathy. Do not allow us to fall asleep again. Evil never sleeps and it delights in an empty playground with no holy soldiers to keep it at bay. May we always look to You. Touch the hearts of Your people to be holy soldiers. May we remain compassionate to all Your people and zealous to defend our right to love and serve You. May we find You in the hearts of all those around us and may we always reach out with the same compassion and love that touched our hearts on 9/11, over a decade ago.”